The Misadventures of Jack Cakeston!
by FatalityMass
Summary: Meet Jack a perverted good for nothing mage... Or is he! Watch as he butts heads with Erza the Titania Scarlet, kick lots of butt and eat his favorite chocolate cake! Please read and review! Constructive criticism please. Disclaimer: Would I be on a fanfiction site if I owned Fairy tail? First fanfiction ever!
1. Why you don't badmouth strawberry cake

**Hey FatalityMass here and this is my first fanfiction. Now before you go I ask you to read this story and review it. Give me constructive criticism and please no flames. This is my first shot at fanfiction like I said. This is dedicated to an awesome up am coming writer Stickerman50! I hope you all check him out. He has two crossovers going and if you like Naruto in the world of fairy tail than you'll love his story for its originality and his own story arcs! Check him out people! Alright on to the story! **

**I own nothing! **

_"thoughts"_

"dialogue"

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><p>It was a peaceful day in Magnolia town. The streets bustled with chatter and business. The were many shops and restaurants in the city. And with this small description of the town let's take a look at Erza Scarlet's next victim. I mean enemy! You see Erza was a young lady with Scarlet red hair, brown eyes, heart shaped face and was well the definition of beauty... Then you look at her clothing. She dawns a Custom made Heart Cruz's armor and a blue skirt. Did I forget to mention that Erza was currently running to her favorite place of all time? Pushing aside ANYONE WHO DARES TO STAND BETWEEN HER AND THE CAKE SHOP!<p>

"The shop owner should be resupplied with the food of the gods by now!" Erza thought as she bursted through the door of said shop. Instantly standing before a line of 10 people. Erza got in line calmly ignoring the looks she received for nearly ripping the door off its hinges when she came in.

In front of her in line stood a man named Jack Cakeston. He possessed lightly tanned white skin, green as grass eyes, jet black spiky hair that reached his mid back, and a slick jaw line that made him appealing to any woman. Jack wore a black over coat that was long sleeved and had a white outline, the coat went down to his ankle. Underneath his coat was a white shirt Erza couldn't tell if it was short or long sleeved. He wore blue jeans with one hand in his pocket. He too was very intent on getting his cake. The intent even showed in his eyes.

Erza noticing this tried to strike up a conversation with him. "Excuse me sir my name is Erza and I could help but notice that you too are a fellow cake lover." Deciding that a common interest would start up a conversation that could occupy her until she could have her delicious strawberry cake. Jack turned around to see a beautiful scarlet haired girl. After about two good seconds he replied "hi my name is Jack and yes I do love cake, how did you know?"

"Well I saw the desire for something delicious in eyes. Since you In a cake shop I assumed that you like cake Jack-san." "Aren't you observant Erza-chan. Yes I do love cake almost any cake is amazing!"  
>"I agree with that cake is the food of the gods!" "But there is one despicable flavor but there is one horrible flavor!"

Both Erza and Jack looked at one another as if they knew what the other would say next.  
>"ChocolateStrawberry!"

Both of them froze and looked at one another In complete shock. Erza spoke first breaking the uncomfortable silence. "How could you not love Strawberry cake?" She asked horror imbedded in her brown eyes. Jack made the biggest mistake of his mortal life and said "Because its repulsive! How dare you call chocolate despicable!"

Erza's instincts took over. She requiped into her Heavens Wheel Armor and kick Jack square in the gut. Sending the guy flying though the window of the shop and down the street into a pole... Which bent on impact! "Ooowww that freaking hurt like hell!" Jack wheezed as he got his air back. Jack then looks up from his gut when he hears footsteps closing in on him. There stood Erza in a metal outfit that he thought made her look like a metal angel.

"Care to repeat that Jack-san?" Erza asked with oh so false sweetest. Jack stood on his feet deciding that he wasn't about to take trash from a girl in some skimpy outfit and stated"Its repulsive Erza-chan." Erza this time attempted to punch him in the jaw. However Jack had caught her fist and quickly created a purple flame in his other hand and punched Erza in her exposed stomach. He then as his fist stuck the shocked Titania made the purple flame explode causing Erza to fly backwards ten whole feet. Erza finally recovering from the shock that A. this guy blocked my punch and B. he's a mage too!

"So your a mage too. Well then at least the master won't be too angry that I sent you to the hospital." Jack just remained quiet. He currently was just trying to figure out Erza's magic. "Let's see... She glows and then is wearing different clothing and has a weapon and she requips with such speed its perfect for combat. Is she the Titania of Fairy Tail?" "Hey Erza are you the up am coming mage known as Titania?"  
>"Yes as a matter a fact I am." Erza replied proudly. Jack realized that he would not win this fight but that sure as hell didn't mean he would try.<p>

Jack rushed forward several steps and then stopped threw both his hands out and shouted "Purple Net!" A purple magic seal materialized in front of his hands and out of it came a fire ball that contorted into a giant net of purple flames. Erza knew that could dodge the attack so she requiped into her adamanite armor to block it. Jack smiled at her mistake. The flames simply wrapped around the shield like a net and all the ends of the net converged on her mid back a struck her violently, sending her forward towards Jack. Jack saw her being pushed by his flames toward him and jumped back a couple feet than put all his magic power into his left fist. Erza requiped into the flame empress armor only to see Jack's left fist in time to upper cut her.

Meanwhile

From a distance Natsu saw a giant pillar of purple flame with what looked like Erza flying in the sky. "Normally I would go that way but... Why am I always stuck on the train!?" Was all Natsu could think as he practically fainted on the train heading to Hargion station.

Back to Erza

"OK that's it!" She thought as she requiped into red pants with flames the bottom and she wore bandages over her chest and now her hair was in a pony tail. As she fell back to the ground she focus he magic into one of her most powerful spells. A Katana requiped into her hand. It had a black blade and bandaged handled.

Erza was going to destroy the hater of strawberry cake with one strike. "DEMON BLADE CRIMSON SAKURA!"

Jack heard Erza shout and then the next thing he knew there she was in front of him slightly scratched with a bruise on her chin. Then he saw the ground under him become suddenly engraved with a giant slash between his feet. Finally Jack simply dropped to the floor face first.

"That's why you never insult the food of the gods!" Erza exclaimed as she requiped back into her Heart Crux clothing. She then walked into the shop to get her cake. While Jack was picked up by the authorities and taken to the hospital. Jack was in the hospital for two months in a coma. All he dreamed about was eating his delicious chocolate cake.

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><p><strong>So what did you guys think? Should I have Jack come back for revenge or simply leave it at that?<strong>

**Its up to you guys so please read and review!**


	2. Of all the things to break

**Hey everybody so here's chapter 2! Thanks to Stickermans50, The Flash Pirate, and Lightningblade49 there's another chapter for the worlds enjoyment I tried being more detailed about environments this time around and followed some pointers I received from the 3 awesome guys that were named! You should check all three of there stories out. Read and review, and don't forget to follow and favorite!**

**"_thoughts/flashback"_**

"dialogue"

**I own nothing!**

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><p>Jack was currently in a large open field as green as his eyes filled with chocolate cake as far as the eye could see. Jack had only one question and he decided to ask the world.<p>

"IS THIS HEAVEN!?" Jack could barely hold his excitement. He was skipping through the fields and taking a bite out of some chocolate cake as he went. "Thank you Erza-chan this truly is heaven! May you one day repent your evil view on chocolate cake!" Jack thought until he saw a familiar pink aura in the sky.

"Wake up you good for nothing chocolate cake lover! DEMON BLADE CRIMSON SAKURA!"

Jack then woke up from his coma and jumped right out of bed and... Use his purple flare magic to attach to the ceiling, on all fours. Jack finally realized that he hasn't died and he's in a hospital. Jack hates hospitals. For the one reason they don't let him eat his scrumptious chocolate cake because its **not** **healthy**! Jack got down grabbed his clothes and put them on. He then left the completely white room that only had a single sized bed and IV, and went to the front to check out. After he found out that he was in a coma for two whole months decided it was time to pay Erza a visit. He was originally going to pull a harsh prank but decided against that when he saw that she had paid for his hospital bill.

No Jack was going to thank her for that and hopefully become friends who overlook their cake problem. So he started walking towards Fairy Tail. As when he got there he saw a whole bunch of iron pillars embedded in the building. He ran towards the building and was about to enter when he heard our favorite pink haired dragon slayer shouted"DID YOU DO THIS TO OUR GUILD?!" Before he could even reply a flaming fist was already flying to his face. He quickly moved his head to the side, causing Natsu to soar over him. Jack was about to say something to be interrupted again. But this time the voice was familiar with the commanding tone and all. "Natsu this man uses fire magic so he couldn't have done this. Stop being stupid and let him speak because last time I saw him, I had beat him into a coma." Erza stated with a little guilt in her voice.

"Can I talk now?" Jack asked only to receive one of Erza's famous death glares.

"Yes you may." Erza replied with venom in her voice. She probably remembered what he said about her cake.

"Thank you Erza-chan. Now why am I here as your probably wondering is to say this... Thank you for paying my hospital bill." Jack felt good about this thinking he had done well.

"It should be me who's apologizing for using such a powerfully attack to defeat you. Please hit me!"

"Whoa wait up its okay you were angry after all one one should never insult cake no matter what type...not to mention I got a nice view before I went out, they were all I my face... I got to stop being perverted." Jacks said except the last two parts were only thoughts.

"No as punishment for my actions please hit me!" Erza stated in her resolve to be punished.

"Uh ok." Jack put his hand up then lightly patted her head then ruffled her Scarlet hair.

"What was that?" Erza asked obviously confused.

"I make a point not to hurt someone who doesn't deserve it. One things for is that you don't deserve to get hit. I wouldn't have had the money to cover the bill." He replied trying to make Erza feel as though she had helped him enough.

"Well how about we check out the inside of your guild hall." He said as he walked team Natsu in.

Now Jack our favorite strawberry cake hater was in an inn. The inn had all his needs a bed, small kitchen, a fridge and a bathroom. The walls were an ugly mustard yellow with white trims, and occasionally a bug would go across the floor. He would practice some small scale fire magic on the insects so he was alright with them.

_"So let's think about today. I apologized to Erza. I also got to meet the guild master but that was...interesting."_ Jack recalled how the man was really short with an orange outfit and kinda looked like a jester in a play. Not too mention was so drunk he slapped the blonde girls Lucy's ass which he could only think how bad he wanted to do that now. Then the old man ran for his life, but not from Erza or Lucy nnnoooo. He ran from Mirajane the really sweet barmaid with a rocking body that was fully covered by her maroon dress. He found the Master running from the woman strange but when he sensed her anger and felt her eerie aura he finally understood why. He kinda felt bad for the mages of fairy tail because they were literally based in the basement of the guild hall, plus the Master wouldn't allow them to retaliate for the guild damages. He knew that if he was in the guild, he would personally burn down Phantom's guild hall. Then something hit him like a train!

"She never said my name! Which means she **forgot** it!" Jack couldn't believe it! How had he not picked that up during there conversation? But now he was considering something big.

_-flashback-_

_In the back room of the basement. Jack was currently speaking to the guild master of Fairy Tail._

_"Young man, I can feel that you are strong but I have to ask why such a talented mage as yourself is not in a guild?" Makorov asked._

_"Well old man I have never really needed to. I travel better alone." Jack replied._

_"Boy what's your name?"_

_"My name is Jack Cakeston!"_

_"Well Jack do you have any friends?"_

_"No. Never needed any. Besides someone traveling with me would only slow me down." Jack stated with a sense of pride because who could say they don't need other people to survive._

_Makorov just looked at him before shaking his head._

_"Jack some prefer solitude but no one can withstand it. How about you join this guild and make friends and also being alone does not make you strong one becomes strong when they have something to protect._

_Jack was shocked to say the least. He had always been stubborn about his views and nobody has ever challenged his view and made sense._

_"You can come by tomorrow with your answer." And with that Makorov left the room._

-flashback end-

"I'll tell him my answer first thing tomorrow morning...after I eat some chocolate cake!" Jack said to no one in particular. The old man had earned his respect, so who was he to keep him waiting for a response. So he made an attempt to sleep but couldn't because his neighbors were really loud during there night time activities. "Stupid paper thin walls" Jack grumbled as he covered his ears with the pillows.

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><p><strong>So what did you peeps think? Was it as good as the first chapter? Please review! Constructive criticism please!<strong>


	3. Old man I have decided

**Hi peoples I'm back and don't expect updates every day because of an evil place known as School. Yeah tomorrow I have to go back. If you like this than check out Stickermans50, The Flash Pirate, and Lightningblade49. Check these guys out and read and review.**

**"**_thoughts"_

"dialogue"

**I own nothing! **

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><p>Jack slept in because of his noisy neighbors not letting him sleep until 3:00 AM. He got up and was still wearing his clothes from yesterday. He went to the fridge and opened it to realize, he never bought any food for it. Yawning he looked at the cloak and freaked out. "Holy cow its 2 in the afternoon!" He started mumbling about the sounds last night and then thought "wait a minute what kind of guy can go for it that long?" He heard his neighbors door open and decided that he was going to see who it was. He cracked his door open and immediately wished he hadn't! He saw that the couple were at least 300 lbs each. "Most the moans must have been them, simply striping." Jack thought out loud.<p>

Now Jack was on his way to the cake shop to eat chocolate cake for his breakfast. When he saw people from Fairy Tail walking by injured. He decided cake could wait and ran up to the two middle aged men in the crowd."Hey what happened to you guys?" Jack asked with some concern in his voice.

"None of your business kid now run along" Said the blue hair mage with a short sleeved white coat that went do to his ankles. Jack decided he should just visit the old man and give his response. So he decided to run to the guild in a light jog and hopefully say what he had to say.

"If only I had gone with him!" Erza exclaimed clearly enraged. Mira had tried to contact Laxus but he was being an ass and left them to what they had, a destroyed guild with injured mages, a single S-class mage her, and a out of commission Master. Just then she heard the door open. And in walked the guy she beat into a coma. Erza had forgotten his name but she would ask him later for now "why are you here?"she asked.

" I'm here to speak with the Master, Erza-chan." Jack had answered sincerely.

"I am afraid that isn't possible at the moment." She stated with a grim look. Erza simply gave him directions to Porlysuica's home. Jack follow her directions and left.

Jack rushed to Porlysuica's home and well almost died laughing when he saw it was a house that was carved into a huge tree. "_What kind of old lady lives alone iin a tree?"_He finished laughing and made himself presentable and knocked on the door. The door opened and he was presented with a grumpy looking old lady with pink hair that dawned some sort of claws on top. She looked at him with glare for five seconds before asking "What do you want brat?"

Jack was taken albeit but replied "I'm here to see to the old man." He stated. Figuring she wasn't one for small talk. She looked at him and then stepped to side inviting him in. As he stepped in he looked around. He saw that the place was rather homey. It was filled with shelves of books a small kitchen towards the back. It appeared to be well lit with natural light. He had to say the grumpy pink hair hag had a good place but then his eyes fell on an unconscious old man. But that wasn't it the old man which had immense magic power had shrunk to about half and was slowly recovering. Instantly Jack knew that magic draining spell had been casted on him when his guard was down. So jack sat next to him and began to meditate while he waited for him to awaken.

Mean while Erza was facing down a walking guild hall that was readying to fire this Jupiter Cannon at them. Erza requiped into her adamanite armor and prepared to block the attack. She stood defiantly and when the cannon fired the last thing she saw before the darkness took her was her guild mates rushing to her side.

Jack felt the power of the spell from where he was in deep meditation. He was working on expanding his magic container with some success. He had increased it by at least a tenth of when he started. Then he felt some stirring of magic in the air. "Not much longer. Just hold out Fairy Tail, your Master is about to wake and will be there in a few minutes." Jack thought as he return to meditation but this time he was preparing a spell that would get the old man and him there in ten seconds flat. Jack has 3 steps to his teleportation. Step one is finding some one with magic power to. He was very limited in this sense the skill had no use in combat since it took time to lock on to people. Step two was establishing an connection to there magic power in perfect sync. Finally was the teleportation. He and anything he's touching gets teleported to the person he synced with. He was in the middle of syncing with Erza who was giving off the most consistent amount of magic power, when he heard the voice of the old man ask

"Have you made your decision young man?"

That broke Jack's concentration. He looked the old man in the eye and then said with certainty prominent in his voice.

"Yes sir I have."

"And what have you decided?"

"I have decided that you are right Makorov and that I need to stop living my life alone and make friends and... I would like to join Fairy Tail!"

Makorov looked into his eyes and could have swore he saw a younger version of himself. The determination in the boy's eyes were sincere.

"Well then we better get going to the guild to help to save my brats." Makorov stated as he stood up back to full power. Jack only nodded he knew what laid ahead and he was excited. When do you get a chance to beat up a wizard saint? As far as Jack could tell this was a royal once in a lifetime opportunity.

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><p><strong>Tell me what you think and review please. This chapter is little shorter than usual but worry not chapter 4 will be longer and will mostly consist of fighting. While Jack gets smart with everyone. Well that's all I got to say so have a great day!<strong>


	4. Get my bandages woman!

**Hi eeveryone! Here's chapter 4! I made it longer than the others and this is the more actiom packed chapter that introduces some new elements to the story! Thanks for the support and I hope you enjoy! Read and review! Its what tells me if you like the story or not!**

"_thoughts"_

"Dialogue"

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><p>Makorov was about to make his way to the door to start walking to the guild to save his children when Porlysuica said something about having to stay and rest but Makorov blew it off saying it could wait. Jack wasn't paying attention and was just trying to remember what he was trying to do like one minute ago. <em>"I was doing something important but what was it." <em>

"Brat are you coming?" Makorov asked.

"Of course old man. Its not every day one gets to kick a wizard saints ass! Get on my back and I'll run full speed! We'll be there in 10 minutes flat!"

"Alright my brat let's go!" The old mam replied as he got on Jacks back, who apparently forgot about his teleportation spell.

"ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME BRAT!" Makorov yelled in Jack's ear as they ran though the forest. Speed only increasing with every passing moment. "What an amazing ability this boy has. He uses purple flare magic so well. Purple flare the fire that cannot be extinguished by wind or water, not only that but does what eve the user wills it to do. This boy uses it almost as well as that woman. The current head of the-"

"Hey old man when we get there, I want to be the one to fight Jose!" Jack stated breaking his train of thought.

"Do you really think that you can even scratch him?" Makorov replied.

"Scratch him? No I'll beat him into the ground!"

"You got the Fairy Tail spirit brat!"

"Now we should be getting there in 3...2...1! And were here old maaaan, why's there a pile of rubble where the guild was?"

Then Makorov jumped off his back and landed front of him. "Brat this is it. You say you want to fight Jose?"

"Yes old man I do." He answers steel resolve in his voice.

"Then you better not keep him waiting!" Nodding Jack now faced the giant robot guild. A magic seal appeared below his feet and he blasted off towards where he felt Erza's particularly low amount of magic and Natsu magic as well. Makorov was only wondering why the boy didn't fly when they were on there way.

Erza was speaking to Natsu and everyone else in the room when Jack arrived.

"Natsu you go save Lucy, Gray get everyone else off this thing!" Erza ordered.

"Alright I get to kick that jerk Gajeels ass!" Natsu shouted with joy.

"Erza I know your tough, but even you can't take on Jose by yourself. Please let me and Elfman support you!" Gray said trying to convince her to let them help.

"No you both are badly injured so-" Erza was interrupted by a voice she never thought she'd be happy to hear.

"So you should all sit back, relax and enjoy watching me kick Jose's ugly ass!" Jack stated.

"Sir your not a guild member so this isn't of your concern." Erza said to Jack who smiled and said

"Erza-chan my name is Jack and don't you think I should be looking out for my future guild mates!"

Erza and everyone else except for Natsu since he was already running in Lucy's direction, instantly knew what he meant.

"Ok Jack-san we'll face Jose together!" Erza said with a small smile.

"My, my the great Titania is going to face me with some one who isn't even in her guild." An snark voice echoed though the room.

"Everyone go! Me and Jack-san will defeat him!" Erza told her friends.

Everyone else ran off back to the rest of the guild, leaving Erza, Jack and Jose in the room. Jack released his magical aura, which was purple like his fire, Erza releasing her aura which was pink in color. Together there magic power easily could reach the level of the eighth Wizard Saint. Then Jose released his own, it was black in color and it practical made the air hard to breath. Jack smiled and said with clear confidence "Are you just going to stand there or do we have to make the first move?"

Jose said nothing and lifted his hand then flicked his finger. An invisible shockwave rushed towards Jack and sent him flying back into a wall which cracked as he was embedded into it. Erza requiped into her black wing armor and attacked. "MOON FLASH!" A white wave of energy flew towards Jose who simply leapt over it. While he was in mid air he aimed a finger at Erza and fired a purple laser at her. Erza rolled to the left to dodge. Jose was repositioning his aim when Jack made his move. Jack jumped out of his rather uncomfortable spot and flew straight at Jose. He created a Whirlpool of fire in his right hand, that contorted into a rapidly spinning drill covering his fist. "PURPLE DRILL!"Jose had no time to react so he went to block. Jack struck with all his might into Jose's crossed arms. Jose grunted in pain and closed his eyes this was a big mistake. Jack brought up his Left hand with another purple drill and slammed it into Jose's face and while he was at it brought back his right hand and grabbed Jose's shoulder and pulled himself above Jose and shouted " FORBIDDEN PURPLE TECHNIQUE INFERNO STRIKE!" Jack then double palmed Jose's Stomach with flaming hands that sent him flying into the ground. Jose then bursted into flames which grew into an inferno. "Get up from that." Jack said clearly thinking it was over.

Erza walked up to Jack with a tender look in her eye. Before she could say anything Jack said something that pissed her off. "Now after seeing how bad ass I am... You want to have fun fun time right! Don't even deny it!" Erza reacted not how Jack expected and slapped him. "There is no way I'd do anything like that with you! You, you pervert!" Jack just shook off the rejection and turned his head to the still going purple inferno. "That was easy. I honestly expected more from the Sixth Wizard Saint. I guess I'm even stronger than I thought!"

"HAHAHAHA! YOU THINK THAT COULD BEAT ME YOU ARROGANT FLY!" Jose roared as he came out the flames, some burns on his face and his clothes were surprisingly still there, burnt but good.

"Well no I figured this might happen, but why did you say something so cliché? I mean if you just were quiet and walked out of the fire I might have actually thought you were a badass!" Jack replied nonchalantly.

"Kid your strong for your age. Why don't you join my guild? It will still exist after today and you could be my right hand." Jack stared at him almost as though he was considering the offer. Erza noticed this and requiped a second sword, pointed at Jack just in case he attacked her.

"Point that some where else will ya. As for your offer, well its appealing, but seriously you went with villain cliché number two! Asking me to join your side! What's next? Are you my father... Then again your old enough to be." Jack said with sarcasm.

"Boy I'm going to kill you."

"Then what are you waiting for old man? Round 2 is about to start!"

Makorov was watching from a distance. He had seem and heard everything so far and was curious to see how Jack would fare against Jose_."That boy is no doubt in some way related of that woman. He uses purple flare like anyone else so no one could figure it out. But that purple forbidden technique is something only she has been recorded to do. Jack what are your relations to Aya Mitomi?"_ Makorov asked himself after his assessment of Jack's spells.

Erza walked in between both the boys and asked José a question. "Why did you do this to our guild?"

Jose looked at her and then said"Because Phantom Lord is the number one guild! Not Fairy Tail! Phantom is better than you lot! Yet people now were comparing the guilds and some even explicitly state Fairy Tail is better! By destroying your guild I will prove Phantoms superiority!"

"You did this because of jealousy!" Erza was honestly shocked at this.

"Erza-chan sit out I am going to crush him!" Jack said.

"But how you can't beat him alone! Let me-"

"Erza-chan I will win! Just believe in me. This guy is trash fighting for himself. I am fighting for my a chance at a place to call home, with good people and... I must test something some one told me."

_-Flashback-_

_In the back room of the basement. Jack was currently speaking to the guild master of Fairy Tail. _

_"Young man, I can feel that you are strong but I have to ask why such a talented mage as yourself is not in a guild?" Makorov asked._

_"Well old man I have never really needed to. I travel better alone." Jack replied._

_"Boy what's your name?" _

_"My name is Jack Cakeston!"_

_"Well Jack do you have any friends?"_

_"No. Never needed any. Besides someone traveling with me would only slow me down." Jack stated with a sense of pride because who could say they don't need other people to survive._

_Makorov just looked at him before shaking his head._

_"Jack some prefer solitude but no one can withstand it. How about you join this guild and make friends and also being alone does not make you strong one becomes strong when they have something to protect._

_Jack was shocked to say the least. He had always been stubborn about his views and nobody has ever challenged his view and made sense._

_"You can come by tomorrow with your answer." And with that Makorov left the room._

_-Flashback End-_

"Please Erza let me fight him alone." Jack now had just begged her. Erza reluctantly agreed with a single nod. Then she requiped into... a full body bunny suit. She requiped a sign that said round 2 on it. She walked away holding the sign. Jack and Jose both had a nose bleed going as the stared at her ass as she walked away. Jack was the first to snap out of it and rushed toward Jose who was still staring at her ass. Jack for some reason was angry about that."Why do I care if he's staring at her ass? Because that ass belongs to you! Where'd that come from?" He snapped out of his thoughts now close enough to Jose, he pulled back his right hand and use Purple Drill. He slammed his fist into Jose's face, then proceeded to knee him in the stomach. Jose gasped for air as he bent over grabbing his gut. Then Jack made a fire ball in his left hand and smashed the ball of purple fire into the side of his head. The fireball exploded and pushed Jose over.

Jose looked up at Jack with sheer rage."DEAD WAVE!" he shouted as a beam of black energy hit jack dead center in the chest. Jack was sent flying back after the beam exploded. A hole now visible in his shirt and some scratches on his person Jack stood up and looked at Jose who seemingly disappeared and reappeared in front of him. Jacks eyes widened as he was punched repeatedly in the gut. Then got kicked in the face. He was about to fall over when Jose grabbed him and tossed him like a ragdoll into the air. "DIE DEAD STORM" Jose shouted as he fired 20 dead wave shots at once at Jack who curled up into a ball and took the hits head on. The Beams all hit him and sent him into the ceiling. The ceiling then gave way and the area Jack crashed into followed him to the floor and crashed down on him. He was now completely covered in rubble. Jose turned to Erza and said "Your next Titania."

"I can't win. He's too strong. I guess I'll just lie here and wait for everything to boil over." Jack thought. Then something hit him harder than Erza's demon blade crimson sakura attack. It was Erza's scream.

Jack then remembered "That's right I can't give up because I'm fighting for more than just myself, I'm fighting for the Erza and her friends!" Then he felt as though some sort of barrier was broken and he bursted out of the rubble covered in a cloak of intense flames that and rushed straight towards Jose who didn't have time to react. Jack headbutted Jose with the force of a train and then focus all his new found magic power into his left fist. The flames were black this time and introduced Jose Porla's to an uppercut he would never forget. Jack uppercuts Jose at least ten feet into the air and then like his attack against Erza the first time they met a humongous pillar of fire rose up and Roasted Jose. _"Where did such power come from? Was it the girls screams that gave him his strength?"_ This was Jose's last thought before going unconscious.

"Jack-san! Are you alright?" Erza asked her voice full of concern. Erza had many scratches but wasn't bleeding. Jack on the other hand, was covered in blood, his own. Jack's shirt was all but gone, his cloak was ribbons and only had his left sleeve. His pants we're torn and dusty from being buried in the rubble. Now his injuries were extensive. The right half of his face had blood running down it and one large slash went diagonally across his chest was bleeding out rather profusely. Jack looked at her and said before passing out "Do I look alright to you?... Why don't you act like a girl for once and get me some bandages woman!" Then for Jack everything went black.

Jack opened his eyes to find himself on the floor bandaged. As he got up he heard a voice he was very much afraid of." You know if there's one thing I detest more than perverts its sexist perverts." He gulped, know that he was in for it this time.

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><p><strong>So what did you think? Leave a review! Favorite and follow if you'd like! I forgot to say in the beginning so I own nothing other than OC characters!<strong>


	5. Who said introductions don't hurt?

**Hi everybody! I wrote this ttoday and may have based Jacks pain on a friend. You all know the drill! Hope you like it! Read and review please, it tells me if you enjoy it.**

_"thoughts"_

"dialogue"

"Hi Erza, I said something stupid before I passed out didn't I?" Jack said/asked.

"Oh Jack maybe I should remind you. Do I look alright to you?... Why don't you act like a girl for once and get me some bandages woman!" Erza recited with anger creeping up in her voice. "And to think I was going to reward you so well too." Erza pouted. Jacks face went from nervous to complete sadness. The reason for this was he could be having fun fun time with Erza the Titania Scarlet of all people! He could have told so many stories to some fellow perverts! Erza then walked out the area, she had to help with the reconstruction of the Guild Hall.

"Alright brat where and what color?" Makorov asked.

"Hmm I didn't really think about it... Purple and on the right side of my neck." Jack answered with a serious tone.

"Ok brat here you go." The old man replied as he stamped him. "Brat I have a question for you."

"What is it old man? Could it be you want me to take some hot pictures of Erza? I'll totally do old man as long as I get my hospital bill paid!" Jack exclaimed with a nose bleed already imagining the red head in her birthday suit.

"No boy its not that but go for it I'll cover the bill. I have to ask what are your relations with Aya Mitomi?" Makorov asked very seriously.

Jack practically froze at the name. "I'd rather not talk about her. Its a bad omen." Makorov looked at Jack for a moment then decided to let it go.

Jack walked over to where Erza was. He saw her talking to a stripper, a guy who just breathed fire into the air and a blonde girl with a blue cat being held to her chest._"lucky cat."_ He thought as he stood next to Erza and said"Hi everyone my name is Jack Cakeston!"

The pink hair guy looked at him and said "My name is Natsu! Hey aren't you the guy who kicked Phantoms guild master's ass?"

"Yes I am." He replied thinking he was about to get praised for how bad ass he is.

"JACK FIGHT ME!"

"And the bitchs love me, wait what? No I'm not going to fight you. I can't even feel my crotch man! Hey Erza-chan did you have a mouth with that?" Every single person in the group were shocked that he just said that to Erza of all people! Erza's face got a slight blush but she waved it off and got on her knees in front of him. Jack smiled and said "Look at that the Titania want some more of the-eeeeh, cough, cough!" Jack was cut short and fell to the floor. Erza had delivered a mean right hook into his crotch.

"Do you feel it now?~Jack-san." Erza said while saying his name in a singsong voice. Jack mumbled something. "What was that?" Erza asked wondering what he was attempting to say. Jack just could seem to talk so she said " everyone introduce yourselves before he can say anything that will land him in the hospital. The stripper stepped forward and introduced himself."Hi I'm gray fullbuster. I use ice make magic if your wondering." Then the blonde girl with the cat walked up. "Hi I'm Lucy Heartfila. And I hope your not as big a pervert that Erza said you were." More mumbling. "I'm Happy!"

.

.

.

_"Did that cat... Just talk? Eh must be me going insane. Nothing new there. But damn the blondes tits are huge. That cat is really lucky!"_ Jack thought. Jack finally had the strength to stand and he looked at all of them then said"what I'm about to ask you all is of the most importance. Do any of you know... How Erza's breast fit in her chest plate?" Jack asked this time sure he wouldn't feel more pain for it. Everyone was thinking the same thing in unison "he is screwed!" Erza turned to Jack and looked him in the eye and said"Its a tight fit." That shocked everyone.

"Really well I thought you were going to say magic."

"Hey Jack what's the most magical thing you've seen?" Lucy asked curious about him.

"Well I have to say it was Erza when she was falling from the sky, using her ultimate attack!" Jack replied.

"How was I the most magical thing you've seen?" Erza asked curiously.

"BECAUSE I GOT THIS AMAZING VIEW OF YOUR BOOBS!" Jack said with a nose bleed.

Erza's cheeks turned bright red and then Erza decided to copy Jack's signature finish. "YOU PERVERT!"

Erza exclaimed as she uppercuts Jack in the crotch again. Jack flew off into the sky and disappeared in a flash of light in the sky._ "I'm blasting off for the first of many times!"_

When Jack came back to Earthland, he was able to meet some one else. This woman had white hair and blue eyes, am very well developed body and was wearing a maroon dress. Jack wanted to grope her so bad, but kept himself under control."I saw Erza send you flying so I decided to check on you." She said withdraw such sweetness.

"Ah thank you. I am in a lot of pain. Say what's your name?" Jack asked.

"My name is Mirajane Strauss and I know your name Jack, so are you plotting Amy sort of revenge on Erza?" Mira questioned.

"Well yes I got something in mind. Why do you ask? Gossip? Or do you want in on it?"

"Wow Jack your really smart! Yes I want in on it!"

"Alright than. I need you to..."

To be continued!

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><p><strong>I'm an evil person, I know but tell me what you think and tell me if Jack should be in the Tower of Heaven arc in your review! I'm open to suggestions! Remember to check out Stickermans50 and The Flash Pirate!<strong>


	6. Rumors can back fire!

**Hi everyone! I hope your ready for more misadventures! Please read and review! That tells me if you guys like it. Also pm me if you think you know who Aya Mitomi relationship with Jack is. **

**"**_thoughts"_

"dialogue"

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><p>Mira walked into the guild reconstruction area. She had a mission that was perfect for someone of her particular skills. Oh Erza would be pissed. Gossip is her greatest weapon. She first walked up to her bar. She then for the early hours of the day got to work.<p>

Erza had gotten up late because her alarm had gone off two hours late. She walked into the guild construction area and received many looks. Then she saw Cana waving her over. Erza went to her assuming it was important. "Hi Cana. Is something up?"

"Damn straight something's up! You never seemed the type of girl that liked to grope guys." Cana exclaimed. Erza instantly was taken a back. When did she grope men.

"What do you mean? Where did you hear about such slander and why do you believe it?" Erza questioned with a serious tone.

"I mean you like to grab guys Erza. If you wanted a date so bad you should have asked. Everyone thinks your a pervert!" Cana replied.

"You didn't say who said it or why you believe it."

"Well Mira told me and any one else who ordered a drink so that would be the entire guild. The reason I believe it is because you've never been in a relationship." Cana answered with an as a matter of fact tone.

Erza just shrugged off the looks she got as she marched towards where Mira was currently standing and smiling like nothing. As she approached Mira Erza's aura grew dark and quite scary. She stopped in

of her then asked simply."Is Jack the one who put you up to this?"

Mira smiled"Yep! He said that you are really horny and was even about to give him a..." Mira stopped.

"A what?" Erza asked with curiosity.

"A... Blow job."

.

.

.

"JACK-SAN YOU ARE SO DEAD WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON YOU!" The entire guild hall shook with her roar."Did I hear a bitch call?" Said screwed male organism.

"Jack-san yes a very crazy bitch called you!" Erza roared as she requiped two swords and began chasing Jack around the construction area. Jack was running for his life and as stupid as he is he threw fuel into the fire.

"AHH! MONSTER! SOMEONE STOP HER! VIOLENCE IS NEVER THE ANSWER ERZA-CHAN! COME WITH ME AND WE CAN GO TO MY INN AND TRY TO BEAT MY FAT NEIGHBORS FUN FUN TIME RECORD! ITS ABOUT 2 AND A HALF HOURS SO LETS GO FOR 5!" With that it was official. Today would be his last.

"Erza you yourself have always said killing is wrong. So why are you trying to kill Jack?" Makorov asked while using his giant hands to hold Erza down as she attempted to get loose and kill said male.

"He is a sexist pervert who spread lies about me! I rather not say what the lies are specifically." Erza said with a blush on her face. Jack smiled and said something to piss her off feeling safe."You wish you could do that. But my offer still stands! Fun fun time at my place! We can beat my neighbors by going for five hours! Consider it okay, because you need some stress relief." Yep, as soon as Erza got out she was going to kill him. Jack just ignored her killer intent and then sat on the floor.

"Erza you cannot kill Jack, but you can help him learn the ropes. Spreading rumors was wrong of you Jack." Makorov stated. Erza and Jack looked at him then one another. "I mean that Erza your going on a job and taking him along." Now Jack gulped. "She'll kill me!" He thought."Master I'd rather take Natsu, Gray, Elfman, and Laxus on a job together! I'll kill him on the Train!" Erza exclaimed.

"No buts! Your taking him on any job you like. You will take him." The Master replied.

"Yes Master." Erza said with disappointment.

So here they were sitting in the train in very awkward silence. Jack decided to "break" the ice. "Soooo... How are you doing on this fine day?" Jack asked essentially praying for the silence to end. Erza at first stared at him like he was an idiot.

"My day you ask? Well I woke up and had to help the possibly most stupid man alive. My day is going just great." Erza responded with sarcasm at the end.

"Well, look I know we didn't get off on the right foot, but if its possible can we restart?"

"No."

"Please."

"No."

"Pretty please."

"No, I have figured out the type of person you are and I don't like you."

"Errrrzzzaaa-chan, come on! I can't possibly be that bad to you, can I?"

"Jack-san, your quite literally worst than you think. Your a pervert, sexist, conceited and your choice of words are despicable. Why would anyone like a guy like that? Now before you say anything, like you always do, let me go over the job so we can get this over with. The job is to catch some dark mages that are tormenting the town. Now nod if you understand." He nodded. "Good now here's the thing these dark mages are supposedly s-class, now before you say anything there are only two and I need to ask... How come you never joined a guild before now?" Jack was a little surprised that she wanted to know that. He decided to answer vaguely.

"Well, let's just say I'm a coward running from my past." Erza was shocked that someone like Jack was calling himself a coward.

"Your holding back a lot Jack-san. You beat Jose what could scare you other than me?" Erza asked clearly curious.

"I'm am by far only scared by women Erza-chan. And she is one hell of a woman to piss off." Jack said with only one thought_ "Aya Mitomi, is the only person from the Mitomi clan of assassins that could kill me in an instant. Last time I barely survived. I actually fear her."_ Erza decided to stop questioning him and they slipped back into uncomfortable silence.

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><p><strong>Tell me of you liked the chapter! Read and review world. I've had 309 unique readers and only like 20 reviews... I don't know about you but I think that I should have at least 309 reviews. Is that just my mind set... Ok be silent! Have a great day!<strong>


	7. I'm sorry!

**I am back! You all know the drill read and review! I made a homosexual joke and so if you don't like it I'm sorry. Jack is a perv on woman and has no intrest in men. Please don't be offended.**

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><p>A giant chocolate cake was laid before Jack. He had been frozen in its majesty when he saw a very irritated Erza walking up to him."Wake up, you sexist perv!" She slapped him and just like that Jack's eyes shot open to the stinging slap that she had given him. "Good your awake. We have arrived to our destination." Erza stated.<p>

"Where are we exactly?" He asked.

"We are in Happy Town! A town that is known for its constant happiness!" She replied.

"I better not get hit on by some other dudes."

"Why would that happen?"

"..."

"I'm guessing you don't like homosexuals."

"Nah, I'm fine with a gay guy just as long as they ain't hitting on me."

"Ok."

"So as you wizards can see, we are in quite a predicament. The two dark wizards attack once a week, at a random time, and always on a Tuesday of all days! Tomorrow I would love if you can get rid of them." The mayor said while eyeing Jack who was obviously uncomfortable. Erza didn't seem to notice this and just said"We will get rid of them sir, don't worry."

"Maybe your friend here could stick around until tomorrow, so we can get to know each other better." The mayor said as he licked his lips and looked right at Jack, who was about to introduce the man to a Purple drill.

"No, he will be staying with me, sir."

"Well then good day."

Erza and Jack walked out the building and went to the cake shop. They both hadn't had their favorite food in a while. The shop was rather small but the aromas emanating from it was intoxicating. It had a red flat roof and was yellow on the outside walls. They both stepped inside to be greeted by a room full of shelves of cake and a very kind looking middle aged woman behind the register. "Hi there. Is there something I can help you with?" Now Jack was about to say his order when Erza beat him to it.

"Yes! We would like TWO strawberry cakes." Jack about to protest was elbowed in the gut before he could say anything... again. The baker went to get their cakes.

"Hey are you guys the wizards that are going to save the town." A little voice asked from behind. Jack again couldn't respond because the monster disguised as a woman answered.

"Yes we are what's your name?" Erza asked.

"My names Jim and I want to see you guys fight them!"Jim exclaimed. Jim was about eight years old. He wore a black T-shirt that said 'Fight' on it , he wore blue jeans and had very spiky brown hair.

"Kid, a battlefield is no place for a child. So unless its from a distance ok?" Jack finally got to say.

"Jack-san! This boy shouldn't be anywhere near dark wizards! He should be at home." Erza stated with common sense.

"Well if I can't watch, then how about you guys stay at my house? My parents would love to help you!"

"I'll take it Jim! Come on Erza-chan let's crash for free with this kid!" Jack exclaimed happily.

"I suppose it will be alright. But let's get my- I mean our cake then go." She said.

After getting their cake they left with the boy to his home.

His house was large. Two stories, three rooms and two baths, on each floor. The house was cream and dark gray for the roof. They walked though the double door and saw a cozy home. Its ocean blue wall and red furniture contrasted nicely. A man was sitting on the couch with his wife. "Mom, Dad I brought the wizards here to sleep for the night!" Jim announced.

"Jim dear are you sure that they're wizards?" His mother asked.

"Yeah mom! On the way the guy showed me his fire magic!" He answered

"Then they are welcomed son! Hopefully they can get rid of the pests." The father stated with the disgust. Erza introduced herself. "Hi my name is Erza Scarlet and my perverted companion is Jack Cakeston.

"Well Erza my name is Elsa." Said Jim's mother.

"My name is Sam. It would be my pleasure to give you guys a place to rest your head." Sam said. Jack looked at him then asked. "Do you have a grudge with these dark wizards?"

"Yes we do! Our eldest son stood up to them, and" tears welled up in the family's eyes"The one with energy make mage shot a laser through his chest, and killed him." Erza and Jack both felt pity for the family. Jack then took one step forward and declared while igniting his left hand."I will defeat the energy make mage and send him to jail for life. Upon this flame I make this vow! Your son will rest in peace!"

After that the night went on rather uneventfully... Except when they went to bed. "Wait, Elsa are you saying I have to sleep in the same bed...as this pervert?" Erza asked with distress written on her face.

"Afraid so. We only have one queen sized bed for you guys." Elsa replied.

"I ok with it. Erza-chan, this is a chance to release any stress. We could talk about our problems and what not." Jack stated cool as a cucumber. "Maybe even have some fun fun time. He he!" He thought to himself.

"You better not try anything. And I have to ask up you something, after we take showers." Erza said as she headed to the shower.

_"So relaxing. I wonder if he knows that I know he's peeping. Maybe I should pose provocatively and give him blue balls. No he would just be happy... I know! I'll throw a knife into the wall next to his perverted head!"_ Just as fast as she thought about it she acted. She toss a kunai and cut the male's ear.

_"Oh yeah Erza-chan! Let's see those massive jugs you lug around! Yeah turn on you side. What a PERFECT ASS! Hey what's that black thing? OH SHIT!"_ The thoughts of Jack Cakeston as he realized he was caught.

After they took there shower Erza decided to ask Jack her question from earlier. "Jack-san why did you spread such a vulgar lie about me?" Jack looked at her then after a minute or so he finally replied.

"Well Erza-chan, the lie wasn't what I was going to do until..."

"Until?"

"Until Mirajane got involved. You see she came to where I landed after your incredible uppercut to the nuts. She wanted to help me get back at you. I originally was going to burn all the strawberry cake in town, but she said that was too light. She then said she would come up with a rumor. I asked what it was but she didn't say. I only found out once the she-devil had already spread the word." Jack said sincerely. He really hadn't come up with it. Erza sat on the bed in her pink Pajama's. She looked at him after thinking about it and was about to speak when Jack said.

"I'm sorry." He was looking her in the eye. There was no hint of a lie in his voice, body, or his eyes.

"Let's go to bed. We have a lot of work tomorrow." Erza told him before going to sleep. Jack just nodded and did as he was told.

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><p><strong>Tell me what you think guys! Review!<strong>


	8. Erza vs Mikey!

**Hello everyone! Jack is back and ready for action. Read and review! I own nothing and I'm sure no one cares to read this so I won't hold you up!**

"_thoughts"_

**"**dialogue"

**As always I own nothing. Except for my ocs thats it!**

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><p>Squish* <em>"Wow whatever that is, its so soft!"<em> Jack thought as he kept squeezing whatever the squishy thing was. "Ahhh that feels so good." Jack heard Erza moan. He instantly realized what he was grabbing. He slowly pulled his hand back praying that she hadn't seen his hand. "Jack-san were you just groping me?" _"Good bye cruel world... You know what? It was worth it!"_ That was all Jack could think before He flew out the window of the room. "PERVERT!" Erza shouted as she tossed him like a rag doll.

After the interesting morning. Jack and Erza began patrolling the town, their goal was to find the dark mages and kick ass! As they were walking Jim had been following them. After all he wanted to see them win. They were in the town square when the duo found there targets "Energy make:Laser!" A tall man at about Laxus's height shouted as he fired a white beam into a building, destroying it. This man had spiky purple hair, he wore no shirt and his kaki shorts went down below the knee his Gray eyes scream blood lust. "Twister!" Shouted the second man. He was about Levy's height with long blonde hair. His left eye as red as blood and his right blue as the sky. He created a tornado that ripped though the square carving into the ground as it went.

"So these are the assholes messing with your village. HEY FAGOT WITH THE RETARDED PURPLE HAIR! I'M HERE TO KICK YOUR ASS!" Jack shouted at the purple hair mage. The mage turned to face him and told his ally"Look at this Mikey, we have another badass over here. I will kill him for his insults." He then looked at Erza."You should catch his lady friend, its been too long since we've had fun with a woman."

"Yes sir! I look forward to digging into her tonight!" Mikey said while licking his lips. Jack knew he was about to fight a life or death battle here. Erza looked at him and said"I'm going to lure Mikey away from here. Can you take him alone?" Erza asked. Jack looked insulted by her question.

"Erza-chan I beat Jose into a bloody pulp, I think I can kick this guys ass too." He replied. _"I just need to figure out where that power came from."_ Erza began to run down the street. Mikey chased after her. "Please be careful Jack-san, that man is practically has power pouring off him." Erza thought as she left the area. Jack looked at the Energy make user. Jim got back and was watching from a distance. "Are you ready to die?"

"Nah! I'm ready to send your ass to jail!" Jack stated defiantly.

"Prepare yourself. I was recently inducted into the Mitomi clan guard. If you don't know, that means I am considered elite." Jack shivered slightly hearing the name Mitomi. His opponent noticed it."So your afraid of the clan, that is wise. Now then here I come!"

Jack ignited his left hand and rushed forward"NOPE I'M JUST SHAKING WITH EXCITEMENT!" he shouted as his purple drill slammed into the other mans energy covered hand.

"I should be far enough by now." Erza thought. She stopped and turned around to face her assailant. "Did you get tired of running or do you want to have sex?" Erza looked him in the eye and said.

"As if I would give my virginity to you, or your friend. I am saving that for whoever is my future husband. I on the other hand am going to defeat you!" Mikey just looked uninterested. He raised a hand and fire a bullet of air at her. Erza sidestepped it, and then requiped into her lightning empress armor. It was a white robe that covered her well and split at the bottom. Her legs were out in the open and she was holding a spear. "I've always liked spirited women." Mikey stated as he smiled perversely.

Erza didn't reply to him, he was trash and he was even more perverted than Jack. That was really bad because Jack is extremely lusty. He was groping her that morning and now this guy wanted to rape her. "Just my luck." She dashed forward with lightning covering her spears blade and swung a vertical strike. Mikey rolled to the side and fired two air bullets at her. Erza stabbed her spear into the ground and spun around it, dodgeing his bullets and launching herself at him. Mikey may be agile, but not agile enough. Erza land a kick to his face. There was a loud crack. The man grabbed his bleeding nose and was repositioning it when Erza grabbed her spear and hit his stomach with the butt. He buckled over as he tried to get some air. Erza went in for the finish she electrified her spear tip she used her lightning beam attack point blank into his back. Mikey's body was surrounded by electricity, and burned to a crisp fell to the ground unconscious. "Now I need to get to Jack-san. The authorities should be on their way to capture these guys." Erza thought as she ran to the square.

Jack was currently dodging some lasers. He then made his hand into a gun shape and fired a barrage of purple flaming bullets at his enemy who he still didn't know name. The large man jumped over them and landed next to Jack. He threw a right hook. Jack lean back to dodge and kicked his side. The man was hit but caught Jacks leg. Jack lost his balance and was about to fall, over so he used the man grip against him. Jack used his free leg to kick him in the face. He grunted in pain, and began to spin around while holding Jack's feet and after picking up enough speed he left go of them. Needless to say Jack went flying... Into a cloth line... With panties on it. One of which was more like a thong and was on his face. _"Who ever I marry or have fun fun time with better wear one of these and give me a lap dance!"_ He thought while getting pulled back into reality by something grabbing his feet and throwing him into a wall.

Jack decided to end it. "PURPLE FORBIDDEN TECHNIQUE! GRAND INFERNO TORNADO!" He shouted as a giant magic circle appeared under his opponent's feet, and a large purple tornado erupted out of it. It spun violently and was pushing air away from it while whatever is inside is forced to stay inside being vaporized, if the caster wished for it that is. Jack kept it going as Jim ran up to him."Is it over?" The boy asked with hope in his eyes.

"It sure is. Your brother can rest in peace." Jack said as he looked at him. Erza came up behind him and tapped his shoulder."Jack-san are you okay?'

"I've been better. I think I did good work so I think I should be rewarded, no?"

"We'll get you some chocolate cake on the way back to the guild." Just as Erza said this a white laser came out the flame straight for Jim. Erza couldn't move fast enough. Jack threw his body towards the boy and pushed him out the way. The laser went straight through Jacks chest, ripping through his left lung collapsing it. When the laser dissipated there was a hole through Jacks chest with blood gushing out of it. Jack then fell to to the ground. "JACK-SAN!"

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><p><strong>Tell me what you think! Review please! <strong>


	9. My bad ass level is over 9000!

**Hey guys I am back! I was writing my other story and what not, so I haven't updated in a while I know. Plus some technical difficulties on this site have made it difficult. But here it is! Jack Cakeston is back! You all know the drill and how I write by now so... Here it is!**

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><p>Erza watched Jack fall forward and land face first on the floor. "That bastard actually hurt me." Erza turned to the inferno that was dying down. "Oh well, now he's dead. Your next Missy." The man stated. He walked out badly burned.<p>

"Who are you!?" Erza demanded from the man. He looked at her.

"I am known as Lance. Though I am surprised that another wizard can use Mother Dearest's techniques." Lance replied cool as a cucumber. Erza didn't know who he was referring to but she took a mental note of the name.

"Jim leave this area immediately. This is going to be very violent." Jim doing as he was told ran off. "As for you... For harming a member of Fairy Tail, I will DEFEAT YOU!" Erza requiped into her heavens wheel armor. Lance almost looked thoughtful.

"Sorry Titania... But as of right now our battle will have to wait. I am injured and wish to face you at full strength. Good bye." He then used his energy make magic as a booster and attempted to fly off. What he did not expect was his foot to get caught by purple fire. Erza was shocked at what she was seeing.

"WHERE THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOUR GAY ASS IS GOING!?" Shouted a very pissed off Jack, who pulled Lance back to the ground. Slamming him into the concrete. "I HAVEN'T FINISHED KICKING YOUR ASS!"

"HOW ARE YOU STILL ALIVE!?" Lance asked panicking. Jack looks him in the eye.

"Simple, My badass level is over fucking 9000!" Jack replied while dragging Lance towards him at high speeds. Jack then created a sphere of purple flames above them. "TAKE THIS! FLAMING BARRAGE OF FISTS!" The sphere then began forming fists and firing them into Lance. Pushing him into the ground while burning off some skin. Erza couldn't believe what she was seeing. Jack looked half dead, and yet he continued on fighting. "He really does belong in Fairy Tail. He... Is a Fairy Tail Wizard!" She thought to herself.

"THIS IS FOR ALL THE PEOPLE YOU'VE HURT! INCLUDING JIM'S BIG BROTHER!" Jack shouted as he then just dropped the whole fireball on top off Lance. Knocking him out cold. Coughing blood jack turned to Erza. She was smiling at him. "Bitch I hope you learned how to bandage people because I need it really bad." Then he fainted with a smile on his bloody face. Erza instead of being offended just smiled back.

"Your just like me. Hiding your heart by acting like an asshole... Jack your really care on the inside don't you?" Erza spoke out loud.

xxxxx

In the Mitomi clan head quarters.

The headquarters was styled like a Japanese nobles home. A pond in the center with open hall ways. The rooms all had sliding doors and that classic bamboo decorations. Inside what appeared to be a comfy bedroom. There were two people inside, the room with beautiful cherry blossoms painted on the walls with flowers everywhere.

"Mother Dearest, Our client says that a man using your spells defeated Lance." Said a nameless scout.

Mother Dearest had green eyes and very long jet black hair, going down to her thighs. She wore a white kimono, and bamboo sandals. "Really... So what guild is he from?" She asked calmly.

"Fairy Tail my lady."

"Thank you, now leave." Without another word the man left. She then looked out the window at the moon. "So that's where you went, Takahiro." Her hand lit on fire, as she began to walk out the room. After she left she walked to a giant steel ball. Easily the size of the reconstructed Fairy Tail building. She lifted her hand and place it against it. The fire in her hand then seemingly went out, she then walked away. The breeze picked up and the steel ball turned to ash going with it.

xxxxx

Jack once again was dreaming. This time he was floating in space, with giant chocolate cakes floating with him. "Yep its official... I MADE IT TO HEAVEN!" Then almost as if he was always destined to be kicked out of beautiful dreams, Erza happened to be flying a space shuttle and rammed into him shouting.

"WAKE UP YOU FOOL!"

xxxxx

Jack opened his eyes to see he was on a train. He was practically a mummy under all those bandages. Erza was staring at him as if waiting for something.

"Who are you staring at Erza-chan?" He asked.

"I am waiting for you to say thank you." She replied as if it were obvious.

"Why would I?"

"Because, I bandaged you."

"So?" Erza would normally have punched him for that but not this time.

"Jack-san I have figured you out. Why do you fake being such an ass?"

"Fake? What, like you with that armor?" Erza's eyes widened.

"Listen only people who have rough past put up such defenses like us. Erza-chan I'm sure your wondering who Mother Dearest is." Jack continued. Erza then realized he too had a rough past, that he was running from too. She nodded. Jack gulped. "Mother Dearest is the name Aya Mitomi goes by while on the job. Also she is easily able to go toe to toe the Master. I also have some past problems with her. Honestly last time I encountered her was just her trying to kill me while I ran. Erza you know that I fear no human being, hell I would tell Zeref to go fuck himself. Her on the other hand... I wouldn't be able to insult her." Erza was shocked at this. She then realized that Jack was a scared soul.

"Jack-san remember that your a proud member of Fairy Tail! That its your home and that together we can defeat anyone! Jack-san I know tat inside you care very much for others and so... I forgive you. I miss read you and I think that we can start over and be friends. Your not as bad as I thought." Erza smiled.

"Thank you." He smiled back and for the first time truly felt relaxed.

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><p><strong>So, did you guys like it or nah? Whether you did or did not, drop a review to let me know. Tell me what you liked or didn't and where I need to improve! Review everyone!<strong>


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